Fake Emergencies

Hi I'm Rowsdower the producer of your Hard Rain show. The thing that goes bump in the night, the guy your mother warned you about, conservative hippie and I'm sick of this crap!

This fake Emergency crap!

So Obama has declared the H1N1 Swine Flu virus a national emergency. I'm sorry if anyone you know has gotten sick or died of the swine flu but I gotta ask why? This flu has been described as being milder than the regular flu which kills around 36,000 people per year according to the CDC. No State of emergency for that though, right Bama? Bama Lama Ding Dong? Bamm Bamm Bamm Bammy and the Jets? Of course not. Thousands of Americans dead every year isn't an emergency. Thousands of hysterical scare stories about 'swine flu' on the evening news every night is. So thank you for saving us Obama.

It's not the first time I've seen this either. It's become routine in some "hurricane" states to declare a state of emergency before the hurricane even hits. What is this crap really about?

It's about cutting through red tape, about getting funds flowing faster. I understand that. I'm not against that. I'm against bullshit.

The fact that we have to have a law that says all these other damn laws are gonna get people killed and this is an emergency so we don't want to get people killed right now but maybe later, says to me somethings wrong with the damn law. How about we have sensible laws that don't hinder the growth and progress or even the survival of the American people at all times. What do you say?

No. That's what you say. You're from the government and you're here to help. You're a do-gooder and I'm sure you'll do real good. Do-gooder Chris Dodd did real good with his special mortgage rates from Countrywide Bank. Countrywide's not with us anymore but Dodd still is. Do-gooder Harry Reid did real good with some land deals in Nevada. And The new messiah himself did pretty good with a couple of books written about himself and bought by stupid white liberals. He even managed to buy a nice big house with the money and some help from Tony Rezko.

Back to swine flu though, you wanna know how many Americans have died of swine flu? Well too bad racist. I was talking to Janeane Garofalo and after I had sex with her we both agreed that when people say they want to "know" how many American's have died of swine flu, what they're really saying is, "I want my white guy back." Anyway The CDC isn't keeping track of the number of deaths or cases of Swine Flu and they haven't been since July when they estimated 1,000,000 Americans had it. Did you hear that? The government decided not to count how many people have swine flu. But they're also so concerned about it that they're passing laws saying you can't sue the makers of the the vaccine if you have any problems. Does that sound right? Does that sound logical?

So why is the government behaving this way? You know what this is at the end of the day?

It's the new nanny state. The cradle to grave government that just has to do some "thing." This is the way the government handles everything. Like an overbearing mother forcing you to take cough syrup when you're not sick. And you say, 'but I don't need any cough syrup, I'm not sick.' Then your mother responds, 'your not sick because you take the cough syrup.' What is that Kindergarten Cop? I'm quoting Kindergarten Cop now?

Well go to hell do-gooder, cause one thing I know for sure is this. Barack Obama ain't my Mama.

I'm Rowsdower and I'm Sick Of This Crap.

And say hi to your mother for me alright.